Olivia Attempts To Bake A Cake
by MJohn41468
Summary: Oliva tries to bake a cake, as Brian walks in on her and comedy ensues.


********DISCLAIMER: ********I do not own the characters of Law & Order: SVU (Dick Wolf).

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><p><strong>Olivia Attempts To Bake A Cake<strong>

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><p>"Olivia?" Brian called as he dropped his coat on the chair.<p>

"I'm in the kitchen," Olivia cried out.

An alarmed look spread across Brian's face as he bolted toward the kitchen to rescue his precious appliances from the Domestic Menace That Is Olivia. "The kitchen?" he asked as he sailed in the door.

"Well, of course, silly!" Olivia looked up from her mess and smiled at her husband. "Hey there handsome." Giving him a quick kiss, she turned around again and focused on her work.

"Olivia," Brian forced back a chuckle, "What exactly are you trying to do?"

"I'm baking a cake," Olivia said as if it were perfectly obvious.

"A cake." Brian nodded, moving closer to the unrecognizable blob Olivia was slathering with what he could only assume was supposed to be frosting. "What's the occasion?"

Olivia looked up at Brian again. "You know, my darling honeybear, I thought I was the one who did dumb things like forget important dates."

Brian studied her face for a moment before slapping the heel of his hand against his forehead. "Of course! Our anniversary."

"Humph. Men!" Olivia returned to her creation.

"You know, Olivia, there really is no need for you to go to all this...trouble." Brian raised his hand to her cheek to wipe off some flour.

"No trouble at all," Olivia answered distractedly.

"Ah," Brian nodded again as he started brushing sugar from her shoulders. "Olivia," he stopped suddenly.

"Yes, honey," she sighed, quite tired of the distractions.

"How did you get sugar in your hair?" He asked with a chuckle.

Olivia looked up at him and scrunched her face. "I had a little accident."

Brian raised his eyebrows. "Never mind. I don't want to know." Smiling at Olivia, he slipped his arm around her waist. "You know, Olivia," he said softly as he pulled her close, "It's one thing to sample your food while you're cooking, it's a tradition, even. But you're not supposed to get it all over your mouth."

"Oops," Olivia giggled as she eyed Brian closely.

"I guess I'll just have to clean it up for you then," he said as he leaned forward and slowly licked the frosting from the corner of Olivia's mouth.

Olivia sighed as he pulled away. "All better?"

"Quite," Brian answered.

"Well, then I suppose we should move onto something else." Olivia reached her hand into the bowl and dipped her finger into the frosting. Raising her hand threateningly, she asked, "And where would you like this, Master Brian?"

Brian pulled away defensively and reached for the bowl of whipped cream. Darting for a spoon, he dipped it in the bowl and pulled out a glob of whipped cream, poised and ready to fire. "I don't know, Olivia. Where would you like this?"

"Tisk, tisk, honey." Extending her frosting covered finger toward Brian's grinning mouth she said, "That's not quite what I had in mind." Brian opened his mouth and began greedily sucking on her finger, circling it with his tongue to get all of the frosting off.

Before he finished Olivia slyly reached into the bowl with her other hand. Scooping out a handful of frosting, she launched a full assault and caught Brian square in the face.

"Oh!" Brian gasped, letting her finger drop from his mouth. He dug his spoon back into the bowl of whipped cream and flung it at her. Olivia squealed and turned just in time to catch the airborne mass in the middle of her bare back.

"Eww!" Olivia squirmed around, trying to shake the whipped cream off her back. Brian slipped up behind her and smeared it up her spine to the base of her neck before she could dart away. "Oh! Oh! Oh! You are asking for it now, you naughty boy!"

"Me?" Brian retreated to the opposite side of the butcher block. "You started this one, Olivia!" Grinning broadly, he dug his hand into the jar of flour. "I dare you!"

"Oh?" Olivia batted her eyelashes. "You dare me? My! My! You naughty boy, you know I can't resist a dare." Olivia slowly started circling the kitchen as Brian followed her every move.

Brian watched as Olivia casually scanned the room for more ammunition. As a smug smile crossed her face, he darted quickly for her new weapon of choice. He crashed into her as her hand snaked around the neck of the champagne bottle just a split second before he got to it.

With flour strung all over both of them (and half the kitchen), Brian retreated quickly to the opposite side of the room. He smiled as Olivia shook the champagne bottle, preparing to open it. "Now Olivia, I've never known you to waste a perfectly good bottle of French champagne."

Olivia slowly walked toward him, shaking the bottle the entire time. "Sweetie, really, who said I was going to waste it?"

Brian scrambled toward the six-pack of diet soda on the counter. Tucking them under his arm, he pulled one out and began shaking it, preparing for retaliation against Olivia. "Spraying me with it does seem a little wasteful."

"Not if I lick it off you when I'm all done," Olivia purred as she moved closer.

Brian abandoned his defensive posture and stood up straight. "If you're going to make promises like that, I won't even bother trying to fight you."

"Good," Olivia beamed. "I like an easy target."

Forcing the cork out of the bottle, she aimed the fountain of bubbly at Brian, who ducked and slid across the kitchen with Olivia close behind. Prying open the first can of soda he turned and aimed it at Olivia, catching her full in the face before she crashed into him, sending them both sprawling across the floor.

In a fit of squeals and laughter, Olivia pinned Brian to the floor as she sat up and reached for the jar of flour. Brian swiftly pulled her back down on the floor, only to find himself covered with the remaining flour.

Olivia scrambled back on top of Brian. "Give up?"

Brian caught her gaze and held it as he reached his hand out behind her back for another can of soda. "Maybe," he said as he opened it and began pouring it on Olivia's back.

"Ah!" Olivia screamed and jumped up, knocking the can out of Brian's hands. "You are dog meat now, bub!"

Brian grimaced, "Don't call me 'bub'!"

"Bub, bub, bub, bub, bub, bub, bub," Olivia chanted as she frolicked around the kitchen until she got to the sink.

Brian watched her patiently until she reached for the spray hose. "Oh no you don't!" he thundered across the room. Catching her off guard, he pinned her against the sink with his body. Pushing against him, she tried to turn the hose on him before he pried it out of her hands.

"No fair!" she pouted, as Brian gripped the nozzle victoriously, while continuing to trap her against the sink. "You wouldn't attack a poor, weaponless woman, would you?"

Brian studied her for a moment before sighing dramatically, "Oh...damn straight I would!" He raised his hand over her head and pulled the trigger. Before Olivia could squirm out of his grip she was soaking wet, with water and whipped cream running down her body. "Now," Brian cleared his throat and dropped the hose back into the sink. "Do you give up?"

Olivia fixed her eyes on his for a long moment.

"I'll make it worth your while," Brian promised as he lowered his lips to her long neck. Slowly and deliberately he began licking the whipped cream and frosting from her bare flesh.

Olivia closed her eyes and sighed as Brian licked away all the remaining whipped cream from her neck and shoulders. "You know," Brian whispered against her skin, "this is in the way." He unbuttoned the back of Olivia's halter-top and pulled the shoulder straps away. Then he removed her dress revealing nothing else. He looked at her naked curvaceous figure. "Now, my love, I think we need to do something about all this...mess."

Olivia's eyes never left his. "What do you have in mind?"

"A bubble bath," he suggested, loosening his grip on her.

Olivia pouted. "We're out of champagne, though."

Brian grinned and moved toward the freezer. "We have something just as good, though." Reaching inside he pulled out a pint of Double Fudge Brownie ice cream and turned to wave it under her nose. "What do you say?"

"I say...I'll race you."

**The End**


End file.
